Moralejas buenisimas!!!

(Para variar, me gustaría compartir con ustedes estos chistes que dan ‘moralejas buenisimas’, todo lo cual me han dado tanto placer leyendo los. Espero que lo disfruten tanto como yo.)

 

1. CUANDO SU TRABAJADOR SE ENFERME, DELE EL DÍA LIBRE! 

KUNG CHANG LLAMÓ A SU JEFE Y LE  DIJO: 
– ‘JEFE, HOY YO NO TLABAJAL, YO ESTAL ENFELMO. DUELE  CABEZA, DUELE PANZA, DUELE PIELNA, NO VOY TLABAJO’

EL JEFE LE RESPONDE:
– ‘KUNG CHANG, REALMENTE HOY TE NECESITO EN EL TRABAJO.  CUANDO ME SIENTO ASÍ DE MAL, LE PIDO A MI ESPOSA QUE TENGAMOS SEXO ESO ME  HACE SENTIR MUCHO MEJOR Y PUEDO IR A TRABAJAR.. DEBERÍAS PROBAR, TE HARÁ MUY BIEN’.
DOS HORAS DESPUÉS, KUNG CHANG VUELVE A LLAMAR A SU JEFE  Y LE DICE:
– ‘¡JEFE, NO SABEL QUÉ DECIL! GLACIAS POL CONSEJO, YA  SENTILME MUCHO MEJOL, ENSEGUIDA YO IL TLABAJO FELICITO MUCHO, MUY LINDA  SU CASA, MUY GLANDE SU CUALTO Y MUY BUENA SU ESPOSA’.

MORALEJA ADMINISTRATIVA:
‘LA COMUNICACIÓN DEBE SER CLARA.  SEA EXPLÍCITO CUANDO HABLE CON SUS COLABORADORES’. 

2. RESPETAR LAS OPINIONES 

UN HOMBRE ESTABA PONIENDO FLORES EN LA TUMBA DE UN  PARIENTE, CUANDO VE A UN CHINO PONIENDO UN PLATO DE ARROZ EN LA TUMBA  VECINA EL HOMBRE SE DIRIGE AL CHINO, Y LE  PREGUNTA:

–  ‘DISCULPE SEÑOR, PERO ¿CREE USTED QUE DE VERDAD EL DIFUNTO COMERÁ EL ARROZ?
–  ‘SI’, RESPONDIÓ EL CHINO… ‘CUANDO EL SUYO VENGA A OLER SUS FLORES.’ 

MORALEJA:
RESPETAR LAS OPCIONES DEL OTRO,  ES UNA DE LAS MAYORES VIRTUDES QUE UN SER HUMANO PUEDE TENER. LAS PERSONAS  SON DIFERENTES, ACTÚAN DIFERENTE Y PIENSAN DIFERENTE. NO  JUZGUE…………. SOLAMENTE COMPRENDA. 

3. HISTORIA DE 2 AMIGAS

DOS AMIGAS SALIERON SOLAS, SIN SUS MARIDOS. DE REGRESO EN LA
MADRUGADA, AGOTADAS POR LA BORRACHERA , LES DIERON GANAS DE  MEAR, PERO LO ÚNICO QUE HABÍA CERCA ERA UN CEMENTERIO. DECIDIERON BAJARSE Y MEAR… 

LA PRIMERA NO ENCONTRÓ CON QUE SECARSE, ASÍ QUE SE LIMPIÓ CON
SU ROPA INTERIOR Y LA TIRÓ.
 
LA SEGUNDA TAMPOCO ENCONTRÓ CON QUÉ, ASÍ QUE AGARRÓ LA CINTA  DE UNA CORONA DE FLORES PERTENECIENTE A UN ÚLTIMO FUNERAL Y SE LIMPIÓ CON ELLA. 

A LA MAÑANA SIGUIENTE LOS MARIDOS SE LLAMAN Y UNO LE DICE AL OTRO:
-MAE!!… ESTO YA ES EL COLMO!, ESTOY HASTA LOS HUEVOS DE LAS SALIDAS DE ÉSTAS DOS.. AHORA SÍ SE TERMINÓ DE CAGAR EN TODO, IMAGÍNATE…..
LLEGAR SIN CALZONES A CASA A LAS 4:00 DE LA MAÑANA. 

Y EL OTRO LE CONTESTA:
TENÉS SUERTE, Y NO SE DE QUÉ TE QUEJÁS!!! POR LO MENOS LA
TUYA LLEGÓ SIN CALZONES. MI MUJER LLEGÓ CON UNA TARJETA EN EL CULO QUE DECÍA:
‘NUNCA TE OLVIDAREMOS. CON CARIÑO: TUS COMPAÑEROS DE  TRABAJO’. 

MORALEJA:
NO SAQUE CONCLUSIONES SIN PREGUNTAR, PREGUNTE, SIEMPRE, PREGUNTE ANTES. 

4. AMOR DE LEJOS

UN SOLDADO ESPAÑOL DESTINADO EN IRAK RECIBE UNA CARTA DE SU NOVIA DESDE MADRID. LA CARTA DECÍA LO SIGUIENTE: 
QUERIDO ALBERTO.
YA NO PUEDO CONTINUAR CON ESTA RELACIÓN. LA DISTANCIA QUE NOS SEPARA ES DEMASIADO GRANDE. TENGO QUE ADMITIR QUE TE HE SIDO INFIEL DOS VECES DESDE QUE TE FUISTE Y CREO QUE NI TU NI YO NOS MERECEMOS ESTO, LO SIENTO. POR FAVOR DEVUÉLVEME LA FOTO QUE TE ENVIÉ.
CON AMOR. SOFÍA.
EL SOLDADO, MUY HERIDO, LE PIDIÓ A TODOS SUS COMPAÑEROS QUE LE
REGALARAN FOTOS DE SUS NOVIAS, HERMANAS, AMIGAS, TÍAS, PRIMAS, ETC.
JUNTO CON LA FOTO DE SOFÍA INCLUYÓ TODAS ESAS OTRAS FOTOS QUE HABÍA RECOLECTADO DE SUS AMIGOS.
HABÍA 57 FOTOS EN EL SOBRE Y UNA NOTA QUE DECÍA :
QUERIDA SOFÍA.
PERDÓNAME, PERO NO PUEDO RECORDAR QUIEN COÑO ERES.
POR FAVOR, BUSCA TU FOTO EN EL PAQUETE Y ME DEVUELVES EL RESTO. 

MORALEJA:
AÚN DERROTADO.. HAY QUE SABER JODER AL ENEMIGO


 

 

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A mother’s love

I would like to share this anonymous poem with you all as the world celebrates Mother’s Day. Hope you will find it as moving and true as I have.

Sólo el amor de una madre

Sólo el amor de una Madre apoyará,
cuando todo el mundo deja de hacerlo.

Sólo el amor de una Madre confiará,
cuando nadie otro cree.

Sólo el amor de una Madre perdonará,
cuando ninguno otro entenderá.

Sólo el amor de una Madre honrará,
no importa en qué pruebas haz estado.

Sólo el amor de una Madre resistirá,
por cualquier tiempo de prueba.

No hay ningún otro amor terrenal,

más grande que el de una Madre.

Only the love of a mother

Only the love of a Mother will support,

when the whole world stops doing it.

Only the love of a Mother will trust,

when no one else believes.

Only the love of a Mother will pardon,

when no one else understand.

Only the love of a Mother will honor,

no matter the trials you have been through.

Only the love of a Mother will resist,

in any trying times.

There is no any other earthly love,

larger than that of a Mother.

Happy Mother’s Day!

GMA’s cunning moves

If there is one thing remarkable to say about President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo’s moves, in the aftermath of the gruesome Maguindanao massacre, it is her cunning moves that left many politicians in ‘awe and shock’ and fuming.

First there was Proclamation 1959, declaring Maguindanao under martial law, supposedly to contain rebellion in the province.

Furor was raised by almost all the senators and opposition members of the lower house of congress, for this move caught them in utter disbelief.

A joint session was convened where the constitutionality or legality of Proclamation 1959 was discussed and hotly debated upon.

President Arroyo’s ranking government officials who were privy of the proclamation, like Justice Sec. Agnes Devanadera, Executive Sec. Eduardo Ermita, DILG Sec. Ronaldo Puno, AFP Chief of Staff Gen. Victor Ebrado, Defense Sec. Norberto Gonzales and Police Chief Director Jesus Verzosa, were in the hot seat, relentlessly grilled and often times were at the receiving end of a bellicose diatribe from the opposition legislators.

But even before the joint session was convened, the military was busy arresting primary suspects, discovering more cache of all kinds of military armaments and finding evidences that will be used in the filing of charges of rebellion against the suspects.

What was not lost among all the searches and which martial law is being credited for facilitating it, is the gathering of evidence needed for the filing of multiple murder charges against the Ampatuans.

To that end, it can be said, with all confidence, that the objectives of martial law have been achieved. It did not only allow rebellion to flourish and ensue, but that it also made it easier for government to make the case of murder against the Ampatuans unassailable.

Now, while every body else, including the members of congress, thought that the military role would be imposed longer in Maguindanao, here comes President Arroyo again surprising all and sundry on her latest wily move.

Sooner than expected, she preempts congress and the Supreme Court and unpredictably, lifted martial law in Maguindanao Province, eight days after she declared it.

The palace claims ‘success’, although the state of emergency remains.

Once again the senators and some opposition members of the lower house in congress have become victims of GMA’s cunning move!

Doctors don’t recommend vitamins to healthy people

According to makers of vitamins, about half of all adult Americans that are healthy take multivitamin daily. The question asked, however, is: Are these food supplements needed by the body?

Studies conducted by the National Institute of Health and the Department of Health and Human Services are both saying that the positive effect of daily vitamin intake for the average, healthy individual lacks substantiation.

“There is no compelling indication for adults who eat a well-balanced diet to routinely take a multivitamin,” says Dr. Erin Michos, assistant professor of cardiology at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine.

Dr. Jeff Susman, chair of family medicine at the University of Cincinnati concurs, saying that “for the vast majority of healthy individuals, vitamins are unnecessary.”

He adds, “In the end, our obsession with quick fixes is likely to only cause expensive urine (as these vitamins are passed) and not positively influence health; save up this money and enroll at a gym!”

The American Academy of Pediatrics, as well as the American Dietetic Association, has the same opinion expressed by the doctors as far as children are concern.

Giant jellyfish invades Japan waters

Japan’s Pacific coast is seen to be invaded by ‘sumo wrestler’ size jelly fish believed to be coming from the Chinese and Korean waters where they normally procreate.

The abnormal growth of what is described as the Echizen jellyfish is deemed to be a result of global warming and rising sea temperatures.

The jellyfish could grow to a body size of 2.2m in diameter and weigh over 300kg.

The giant jellyfish is getting to be a menace to many Japanese fishing boats as it does not only destroy the nets due to its enormous weight but is also capable of capsizing the vessel once a large number is caught in the net.

A stunned fisherman said: “I have never seen anything this big before.”

ADDITIONAL VIPs IN MY LIFE

This piece is not to be commented except for those concerned.

This is about someone who has been looking for me for sometime but hasn’t found me until he stumbled on my blog site. He introduce himself to me and I acknowledged who he was.

An intense two weeks of animated communication by email ensued and I thought it would never end. It was surreal at the beginning until we found our comfort zone and started re-living the past.

As it was dreamlike getting more and more acquainted with him, it is just as unreal that what happened next is his deafening silence.

Since then I keep on wondering what has happened. When we were closing on in exchanging cell phone numbers for easier, faster and be constantly in touched,  something seem to have gone wrong. When things were getting better the line went dead. Why?

It would not have taken long before I get to see him as I wanted very much to hug him, like a long lost relative. I wasn’t able to say it, but surely I was insinuating it. I knew he understood it.

Am writing about him here now as this is were it all started. I hope he will find me again and resume communicating. We  still  have so many questions to answer and tales to tell. What is ahead is still fascinating to know.

It should be in his heart and mind that he and someone close to him are additional very important persons in my life now. I wouldn’t want to lose them.

PRESIDENT ARROYO’S NEW JOB

ANTI-DRUG CZAR

In the wake of the Alabang Boys controversy involving the members of the Philippine Drug Enforcement Agency (PDEA) and members of the Department of Justice (DOJ), President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo declared herself, provisionally, the country’s new anti-drug czar.

While the intention is good and well meant owing to the urgency of curbing the nefarious activities brought about by unscrupulous people in the trading and usage of illegal drugs in this country, the question, however, is why add more weight to the awesome responsibilities she already has as President?

Are we bereft of honest, talented and qualified people that GMA is unable to name somebody to head and lead the war against the proliferation of illegal drugs and related criminal activities if, indeed, the problem is in the management of PDEA, the leading agency in the government’s anti-drug campaign?

Or is it simply a show of political expedience that GMA don’t want heads to roll at the DOJ at this time for fear that it might rock her political boat further and cause untoward and regrettable backlash on her hold of the presidency?

Nothing much negative can be said about former Armed Forces chief of staff Dionisio Santiago as head of PDEA. His training, knowledge and wide experience in strategy formulating on the military front as well as his policy-making capability as head of the AFP during his time has made him apt to run PDEA with efficacy. His major asset perhaps is the respect, loyalty and obedience he can extract from his people and the control he has over them.

The same cannot be said, however, on the controversial and irascible DOJ Secretary Raul Gonzalez who is a staunch supporter of Pres. Arroyo. The involvement of some of his DOJ officials in the Alabang Boys fiasco strongly highlights the lax control he has over his people.

Last but not least, Dangerous Drugs Board head former senator Tito Sotto should start showing his teeth in response to the seriousness of this drug menace where, at this stage, it is alleged that it is already helping elect candidates to public office. Simply snarling at the perpetrators won’t help eradicate this type of terror in our midst.

jess sievert